Does anyone else find it unfair that Sonic, the drive-in tasty delicousness of all fast food gorgeosity, advertises non-stop, yet the closest one around here is in fucking IOWA? It's a cock tease, I tell you! (Aforementioned metaphor only working correctly if I indeed had a cock, but you get the point.) I'm going to write them a letter. I'm going to write them a nasty, ugly, persuasive letter outlining every reason why they are just being plain douches about their media buys, and should stop making us hate their lovely food by wagging it in front of us on a forever-unreachable fantasy stick. BRING ON THE SONIC CONEY DOGS BITCHES. You know how much business ONE of those freaking places would get over here? It's an injustice!
In other news, that kid dancing with the fake sheet cow on the Jell-O pudding wiggle commercials is going to be a goddamn celebrity one day. Mark my words. With moves and shorts like that, how can the CosmoGirl-reading generation resist? Wiggle.
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